Sex and Violence (The one where we poke a bear and tell an old story)

Sex and violence was the name of the pilot for The Muppet Show, indicating that this was not Sesame street.
I thought I would start with something light, and you don't get more light than Kermit the frog, so now that we have done that, lets talk about rape.


Cat advised me against doing this topic, but some of the public discussions pushed my buttons, and I just have to. So, of course we hate rape. I repeat, I hate rape. Ok? Ok. I will now move slowly into some areas that are somewhat controversial. Men is no longer automatically blamed for rape and should not be, because, keep on reading, we have accepted the fact that men get raped too. Men rape women, women rape men, men rape men, women rape women, no animals will be involved.
However, men, as a rule of thumb*, are stronger than women and their general physiology and natural genetic baggage, make the men raping women scenario the most common. There is no question about how traumatic and life-changing experience this can be, no matter what gender and scenario we are talking about. It is horrible. So far I think we all agree.

So why do we have these huge blind spots when it comes to everything about rape? I'm sorry to say that common sense seems to have left this issue, and I also think that the feminist movement has done some damage in this case.
If we return to the commonly understood meaning of the phrase "It is always the man's fault, not the woman's" in these cases, I will agree, because the man is the criminal. The problem to me, is that this saying seems to make it ok for women and girls to behave, well, stupid. Women are indeed free to dress and behave as they feel like (within the law). That is such as it should be. No question about that. You have the right to do it. That doesn't mean that you should leave your good judgment at home when you go out. Yes, yes, I know, but listen here. I'm not saying that "she brought it on herself". It is the man who is in the wrong. But for the sake of everything that is good in this universe, try to minimize the risk you are taking. There seems to be some sort of stigma attached to saying this. It goes something as following – If you say that a rape victim in any way used poor judgment or question her behavior, you are saying that rape is ok. The sad fact is that rape happens. A lot. What if we treat it like any other crime, like murder or theft, and look at it again? I don't want to get robbed, I don't throw my wallet around late at night or leave my apartment unlocked. I don't go to parties with only strangers present, I try not to pick a fight when I'm drunk. If a gay friend gets frisky with his hands, I will tell him that this is not ok in a loud and clear voice. Maybe throw in a slap. You might say that this is different and doesn't apply. Well I think it does. But to be very specific, I would not go to a gay bar in leather pants and a fuck me-print on the back of my shirt, get totally hammered, go home with some random guy and ask to sleep on his sofa. I would call it poor judgment on my part if I did. If I got unwanted sexual attention in such a situation, I would still be the victim, because the attention would be unwanted, but I would try really hard not to put myself in said situation in the first place.
This is why I believe the feminist movement has done some harm to this issue. It has helped to raise awareness on the subject, which is good. It has also told all women that it is their right to not get raped, no matter what. This is very true. It is also incredibly naïve. You also have the right to not get murdered, but it could still happen. It should not happen but it does, saying it should not be so, doesn't make it true! Rape is much more common than murder. So logically, you would take more steps to avoid rape, than murder. Instead, some people seem to take none. They take anti-steps, they put themselves in the danger zone. Telling the rapist "only yes means yes, everything else means no", helps just as much as pointing out that murder is illegal as you are being stabbed to death.

Some men are bastards. Raised awareness and slogans have not changed this fact.** Most rapes are committed by someone who already knows the victim. This means that there are more bastards out there than one would think, or it just wouldn't be so. I suppose that this is a reflection of "the prettier the girl, then bigger the jerk syndrome", but this is a bit off topic and can wait for another time.
The betrayal from a "friendly rape" is monstrous, yet this is exactly what is most frequent. So that means that the danger zone and the comfort zone is overlapping. It is a scary thought, I know, but that doesn't mean we should lock the thought away behind bars, we cannot deny something to be considered just because it is uncomfortable. But what the hell is one supposed to do to, what steps can possibly be taken to protect yourself against people you know and maybe trust? Well, I don't really know, but I'd say you should be damn sure you really do trust them before you put yourself in a situation where something could happen. I'm not saying you should live your life in constant fear of everyone. I'm saying that you probably should use your instincts and intellect, take into consideration that men you know could be total bastards, and be careful.


If you the reader are a rape victim, I'm very sorry. If you take offence from something I've said, I'm also very sorry. I say what I say to prevent this from happening in the future, not as therapy for what has happened before. If you are not a victim and still take offence, you can make any and all complaints to my lawyer, Potatobeak the Cat.


 I will end with a true story. This is the improbable tale of how I became the protector of muslim virginity in St. Petersburg.***


 At the age of 18 I was in my last year of school, and as was tradition, all senior students took a trip to St. Petersburg in Russia to study history and culture aka getting totally shitfaced for 10 days or so.
How the small contingent of teachers managed several busloads of mostly drunk and horny 18-19 year olds loose in Russia, I don't know, but they seemed to have a good time too.
We stayed at an enormous hotel smack in the center of town, it was seriously huge. It had internal shops, not bars, well obviously there were plenty of bars there too, where you could buy vodka by the bucketful for a pittance. This was quite the opportunity for Norwegian students who were used to buy a pittance of alcohol for a bucketful of money. We would have epic parties at night and try to grab what sleep we could on the bus between the hermitage and the ballet. It was quite absurd.
Several other groups of students were staying at the hotel, including some Germans and Norwegian in the same part of the building as us. I got to know some of the Germans, and went to some of their parties.**** They were really nice guys. One night, some tour guide or teacher from another group was understandably pissed about our rampage, and as the most functional thinking (though somewhat drunk) Norwegian speaking person around, I had to act as a liaison for all the students and found myself put in charge of keeping some sort of order. Threats about hotel security were made. I still think they were the Russian mafia. Well, ok then. I want to grant the teacher who made me responsible for an entire floor of drunk multinational students while intoxicated in Russia one billion life points. Well done you.
Anyways, at one point I noticed a pair of feet being dragged around a corner. I decided to follow and saw the same feet disappear through a door. I had not yet seen The Hostel, but the imagination went berserk just the same, so I entered the room ready for anything. Turned out to be some Norwegian girls from another school, who had "kidnapped" some of my German comrades who were to drunk to stand. Three or four girls and three or four guys, all in a couple of big beds put together. The Germans came around and found themselves in beds surrounded by pretty girls. What followed contains a bit of fuzzy thinking on everyone's part, but in retrospect, it was just luck that made everything turn out ok. After a quick chat it was suggested that I stayed, not in a hanky panky way, but as a failsafe against it. Yes, I'm ever so lucky, I always get the fun jobs. The situation was a bit awkward, but hey, a free show is a free show and I was supplied with free drinks, so I stayed. The guys talked German to each other and English to the girls. The girls of course understood German but did not let this be known. It was quickly understood that the girls were leading the boys on and constantly moving the borders for what was accepted, but ended up saying no every time. The guys on the other hand wanted me out of the room in belief that my presence was the only thing keeping rock and roll from happening, which was sort of right. At one point they lifted me up and threw me out, but I quickly made my way back in and insisted that one of the girls told me what the blog was going on. And so she explained that they all were muslim, second generation immigrants from turkey or some such, so third base was out of the question. They wanted to try everything else though, and had so decided that I was a perfect chaperon to stop things from going too far. Oh humanity. I thought this was stupid and unfair play, as the Germans didn't know the whole deal, so I promptly told one of them. He was not happy, but told the other guys. The other guys of course still wanted me out. I then sent one of the girls to my room to bring me the box from beneath my bed. This box contained a replica of a medieval flail I had picked up in Stockholm. This made the girls very amused, but the guys reacted just like I hoped and freaked. After some negotiations we agreed I would keep the flail in the fridge (sic) and everyone would behave. So I spent most of the night getting drunk watching TV with my flail in the fridge while protecting the honor of some Turkish-Norwegian girls who wanted to explore their sexuality. Hooray.

The point of this story, besides being slightly entertaining, is that it was pure blogging chance that brought me to that room in time and space. I can of course not say what would or wouldn't have happened, if these people were left alone, but come on people, danger zone. Poor judgment. Just saying.

 *Which has nothing to do about beating your wife with a stick. What so ever.

**And it probably never will.

***100% true.

****I was still able to speak broken German in those days, and that is hilarious when you are drunk.

King Kong vs Darth Vader! Free money! Porn! (I've got nothing)

So we have all seen those dystopian scifi movies and maybe read 1984. 15 years ago one might have thought "I'm sure glad I don't live in a world like that." 10 years ago it might have been "I can recognize some of that stuff from that movie in my world today. Maybe I should think more about what is going on with that science and the world in general".

Today. Well, today we are there. If you didn't stop to think about big brother, thought surveillance and the global community (No, not the hippie kind) until now, you might be screwed.
I'm not talking about drones. I'm not talking about the all-seeing state (yet). I'm not even talking about the NSA. I'm not talking about the 24-7 surveillance and total loss of privacy that is just around the corner, if we're not very careful. I'm talking about the situation as it is right blogging now. We have arrived, the only question is, are you aware of it, and what will you do?

 

hate

 

First, we shall take a minute to look at my grandmother and some theories about technology.

Back in the good old days of Hollywood, they had us flying around in jet-cars, colonizing other planets, living forever in cyborg bodies and what nots by now. Then they adjusted their aims a bit around 20 years ago or so. 2001 was not going to be a space odyssey. We didn't get AI or skynet.*

On the other hand, trying to explain the internets** to my dear old grandmother back when she was around, was impossible. She still lived in a house with no hot water and an outdoor toilet. She had no idea how to deal with new technologies, and she was a bit worried about black people and thieving gypsies. She grew up with 7 siblings at a small farm, promptly lost 5 siblings and both parents. She and her brother lived with an uncle as shepherds, looking after goats, fending off wild animals with sticks and stones. She was a bone-tough*** lady who lived until her late 80s and has been gone for some years now.**** Since the time she lived in a wooden shack as a child, to this point in time, there has been a slight shift in technological advance.

The thing is, if you look at advances made in science and technology, the growth is exponential. We have reached the point where the hypothetical graph is beginning to get steep. The gadgets I could only dream of as a child, are on the market or at least being developed, today. That is a relatively short span of time. We have bionic limbs. We can make the blind see. We have motion capture, virtual reality, 3D printers, semi-nanobots, everything is wireless and some enterprising corporations are making reality shows about how they are picking out the first colonists of mars. When I went to school, we had special lessons on how to use computers in the special IT room. My 9 year younger sister and brother had to bring laptops to school. That is a big jump in a short time. Things progress faster.
This is because of the everything is connected to everything else rule, from now on known as the eicteer. Sounds like Dutch beer. Mmmm. Beer.

At this point, I got sidetracked by the thought of beer. Sadly there was no beer to be had in Casa del Hate at this point. So I then accused Cat of drinking the last beer in a vain hope to guilt trip her to go on a beer run. Cat pointed out that an unknown quantity of beer, wine and indeed whisky from our esteemed household, was last observed in my backpack with my person attached, en route to the bus. It was also suggested that I should stop breaking drinking containers in said backpack as soon as I put it down in said bus, as neither backpack, clothes or bus seat is water/wine proof. It was further suggested that if I didn't insist drinking whisky in the middle of the day, I would perhaps not forget this bottle of 10 year old nectar when taking the bus back. It was also pointed out that this is why we have no more money for beer this month. I hate it when Cat is right.

hate

Eicteer says that advances made in one field of technology will grant benefits to any related branch of technology. With the free exchange of information we have today, new ideas and technology is spreading faster and faster. The point I'm trying to get to somewhere in here, is that the media for this free exchange of thought, is not as free as one might think. This is also because of eicteer. When you Google something, you don't get the information you think you want. You get the information Google thinks you want. Facebook doesn't tell you about everything your friends do. It tells you about the things FB thinks you probably would like to see them do. Some online news sites will show you what they think you think are news. Advertisements, promotions, offers for gadgets, jobs, loans, it is all tailored to suit you. All the big companies who provide online services to you, know what you do and they know what you want. They will share that information to other companies that might be interested in either you in particular or to just expand their platform in general. It is said that the sum of human knowledge doubles every year. Some even say that it takes much shorter time that that by now, but who can really tell anymore. But what the hell is the point of all this knowledge if it is not available to the public? It may be convenient to filter out information you don't need, but if you aren't aware of this, you will get a false picture of the world. Where do the filters end and the cold facts begin? As it is, you might not get the information you want, but they have more information about you than you would dare to believe.

Your digital imprint is out there and it is bigger than you think.*****

Some devices use your fingerprint to unlock. With VR just around the bend, iris scans will probably be next. This might mean a huge leap in security, but it will also mean that some companies will have more detailed information about you than anyone else, including the police (whom we hate), your doctor and maybe even your closest family. Today a good profiler with tech skills can with a good certainty tell your intelligence, your political views, your personality, hobbies, habits and what you had for breakfast, without ever meeting you. This is what the big companies do today. My question is, what will they do tomorrow, and who will it be doing it? And why aren't people more aware of this? It is like the future people talked about has arrived, but nobody noticed. They post pictures of their dinners and don't care that the captain of Starship Future Enterprise is Ronald McDonald. Hatehate.

It is only a question of time until the people who are too old to see are replaced by the young people who take the world for what it is and see some unexploited possibilities.******

I could rant on for hours, but believe it or not, this actually takes some time to write and I have a limited amount of energy. I will attempt to make a punch line.
Freedom of speech and a free press is essential. Freedom of thought is a given. Your life online is being streamlined to make you think what others want you to think. If you do not get the information you look for, but get the filtered version of the truth via clever algorithms, is that free press? Is it free thought?

If Bill gates is right in saying that the internet is the town square for the global village, then surely they are gathering us there for a reason. They might want to sell us hotdogs and put on a show, but the surrounding rooftops are quietly filling up with machineguns.

 

"I support free speech, obviously. But equally obviously, all things must be taken in moderation. This is something we need to strongly communicate to the media." - From Transmetropolitan

* Nor do I think we will get time travel. We haven't seen any time machines. Think about that.

** Thank you Mr. Bush.

***I once saw her chasing away a huge elk with a broom. She was tiny and quite old at the time.

****This is taken from fuzzy memory, don't be mad if I you are family and I got something wrong.

*****That is why I Google how to make bombs and send suspicious emails to myself, just to see what will happen.

****** Maybe the stupidest thing I've said in a long time, but I know what I mean.¤

¤ The most amazingly annoying stupid thing I've ever been told by another live person is "The brain has alot of power." This person was paid to give motivational speeches to the unemployed. hate

Lets explore my body together! (the longest one yet)

Or: Why I hate my body and why it is not for the reason one might think (you bastard!)

Some people find me attractive, some don't, and I don't really give a crap about all that. I am fairly comfortable with my body, and very fond of it. It is, however, not always fond of me back. Before I continue here, I need to say that my so called problems with my body are peanuts compared to the very serious and real health issues of other folks, including many that I know. All my respect to them. That will not stop me from hating my body from time to time.

"When nature comes collecting, it only wants you for your body" – Woods of Ypres

 

This meat bag that I control is a wonderful machine. Commercials will tell you that it only needs pure water from a secret glacier to run. This is of course utter nonsense, it needs lots of other stuff too. hate

This is one of the reasons we are given medicines*. Maybe you didn't get quite enough of this, or too much of that, so now you need pills to make things better. Eating the wrong stuff at an airport in the Baltics, will make a strong man weak as a kitten. Actually it made me wake up one night and realize I was singing loudly to the wall. That was fun. So the body is indeed a finely tuned piece of machinery, and as such very susceptible to various things going horribly wrong with it.

Now, throw a brain into the equation. The brain is just another body part, or organ if you will, and I'm not going to go looking for soul or "ultimate observer" here. (We can play with those concepts later.) Your brain will suffer the same failings as the body, and when that happens, well then we are in a bit of trouble, yes indeed.

Right now, I'm taking a handful of something called Sarotex every night, because I've injured my back. My back will supposedly be fine in due time, but until that time, pain will be an issue, hence medicine. The thing is that sarotex is used both against pain and depression. In addition to sarotex I also take another handful of medications every day, including a very mild anti-depression drug. So now I have two of those. The reason I have to take sarotex instead of other painkillers, is because the stomach refuses to play nicely, and so I'm already on acid inhibitors, thus removing a lot of medicinal options, for medical hocus pocus reasons I do not know. Then there is the allergy pills and the wonderful inhaler that fights an ongoing battle with the tar in my lungs.

This marvelous combination makes my body more or less work, but it also makes my head feel slightly peculiar, I tend to fall asleep if given half a chance, and when I wake up it feels like the body and the brain went to different parties, and the "me" was not invited to any of them. hate

As I now live alone and work somewhat separate from my coworkers, I find myself having to question my own sanity.** This may sound extremely odd or alarming, but I assure you that this is not a cry for help from a borderline personality. I just find it healthy to check in with myself every now and then to see if the medication is playing pranks on the brain. And let's face it, mostly I've only got Potatobeak the Cat to bounce ideas off, and she isn't really a good indicator as to what is considered normal behavior.*** Happily, I find myself sound of mind, if not of body, and writing a blog about hate. I'm a sane man in an insane world. I've heard that crazy people don't realize what they are. I often question and suspect things of my brain, so that is surely a good indication. I also suspected brain damage from back in the days, when I used to try knocking out the street lights with my head****, and I actually got a scan saying my brain was just fine. Hooray for healthy brain.

But there are other bodily problems to hate. Like the time half my face became paralyzed. For no good damn reason. It is supposedly common, but the doctor had no idea why it happened. It didn't bother me all that much, and it was even quite entertaining, could pretend I was Harvey Dent. I didn't even notice what was going on until I brushed my teeth and kept leaking water and spit down one side of my chin. Then I couldn't blink, and had to get an eye patch, and could pretend I was a pirate. I regained about 98ish% of muscle control, but one of my eyes don't always cooperate with the rest of the face. Brain and mouth don't work too well together either. This isn't as great an issue as it used to be, but it would be nice if they both agreed. These things****** could possibly explain some of my unusal high getting-thrown-out-from-the-pub ratio, which I of course hate.

The most serious case of body and brain not agreeing (in a non-lethal way), is the case where your brain says I'm this gender, and the body just goes nope. Then you can hate your body for the rest of your life, or, because happily we are technologically advanced enough, fix it.

Is it ok to hate other people's bodies? Sure, but they seem to hate them plenty enough by themselves. The people and the bodies that they indeed are, and apparently hate themselves, that I hate right back, are the pro ana/pro mia/thinspiration people. (Some people are seriously fat. I don't hate them, but if someone had a "pro eating yourself to death agenda", I would hate them in a heartbeat.)****** Yes, I do indeed recognize eating disorders as an illness and fully realize that it is a huge problem to the people so afflicted, but when resourceful people with or without eating disorders attempt to glorify the illness as a choice of lifestyle, I just want to punch them*******. That type of illness is not created by the media as many think, but goes a long way back in history. What media does, however, is to make the situation soooo much worse. So we're not only betrayed by the body (and the brain), we are also betrayed by the rich and the powerful that "common people" allow to dictate what is beautiful and what isn't, be it the glamorous people themselves or the mega-corps behind the scenes. This is a great time to point back to the post about music industry and the music porn. That is because of the everything is connected to everything else rule. I intend to use it a lot, and it is thus important. Because I said so. No, it will not lead to a revelation of how illuminati rules us all from their hollow-earth land, it is simply what it says. Everything is connected to everything else. If you happen to be a physicist, just be quiet and agree.

The last subject in this post, is the nature of vaccines. Read my lips – THEY ARE GREAT!

Like all medication they cause side effects, some quite horrible if you are unlucky. Vaccines have in recent years gotten a lot of attention, much of it bad and much of it from conspiracy theory nuts. Now, it is a good thing to be critical to and make rational demands from modern medicine, but to just say that vaccines are bad, is moronic. Tuberculosis is on its way back, several cases found right where I live. How will we deal with HIV/AIDS in Africa? Free condoms don't seem to work. How about tetanus? The vaccine is really great if you, say, cut yourself on unidentified trash and want to improve your odds of not dying. "But those are the good old shots", the hippies that fear illuminati yell, "it's the new ones we are afraid of". Oh, like the various bird/pig/cow/whatever flu vaccines, you mean? "Yes, those, they are not properly tested! They are rushed out on the market to capitalize on fear!" Weeeeeel, maybe, maybe not. hate But the thing you have to remember about those vaccines, is that you kind of need them as that particular flu or super-bug is happening. Worst case scenario is that you test them for a long time and then it is too late,hundred of thousands are dead, and a vaccination program can do blog all, because the epedemic is too far gone. hate

How the hell can we hope to put an end to diseases, if we refuse to take vaccines? Just treat the symptoms instead of getting rid of the illness? That will be good fun when you get bit of a dog that looks like it might have rabies. Of course it is your choice what shots and vaccines you get, you shouldn't get forced to take them, just don't be a total moron about it. That is all I ask. Maybe I got half my face paralyzed because of one of the many, many vaccines I've taken. I dont know, but it is certainly a risk I'm willing to take. You know what they say;

"It's better to get half your face paralyzed than being dead" - people

For my own pleasure and possible horror, I will now continue to list all known side effects of all medication I'm currently on.

Or so I thought. The list would take days to edit. The list will not be complete, not include all medications, and probably repeat itself several times. Layout will be horrible. I will not distinguish between common and super-rare side effects. It is a wonder I am alive. For so many reasons.

Insomnia, dizziness, sleepiness, headache, diarrhoea, feeling sick, dry mouth, ejaculation failure, fatigue.

headache

constipation, stomach pains, feeling or being sick, wind, dry or sore mouth or throat

skin rash, itching

changes in liver function test values

tiredness.

depression

joint or muscle pain

fluid retention or swelling

changes in blood cell counts

fracture of the hip, wrist or spine.

fever

restlessness, drowsiness, confusion, hallucinations, insomnia, visual disturbances, vertigo

a change in the way things taste, loss of appetite, inflammation of your tongue (glossitis)

skin reactions such as burning or pricking feeling under the skin, bruising, reddening and excessive sweating

sensitivity to light

hair loss

feelings of ants creeping over the skin (paresthesia), trembling

sore throat, loss of appetite, increased appetite 

feeling strange, nightmare, anxiety, agitation, nervousness, decreased sexual interest, teeth grinding, numbness and tingling, shaking, muscle tense, abnormal taste, lack of attention, visual disturbance, ringing in ears, palpitations, hot flush, yawning, abdominal pain, vomiting, constipation, upset stomach, gas, rash, increased sweating, muscle pain, sexual dysfunction, erectile dysfunction, chest pain.

Chest cold, runny nose, hallucination, feeling too happy, lack of caring, thinking abnormal, convulsion, involuntary muscle contractions, abnormal coordination, moving a lot, amnesia, decreased feeling, speech disorder, dizziness while standing up, migraine, ear pain, fast heartbeat, high blood pressure, flushing, breathing difficulty, possible wheezing, shortness of breath, nose bleed, oesophageal problem, difficulty swallowing, haemorrhoids, increased saliva, tongue disorder, burping, eye swelling, purple spots on skin, hair loss, cold sweat, dry skin, hives, osteoarthritis, muscular weakness, back pain, muscle twitching, night-time urination, unable to urinate, increase in urination, increase in frequency of urination, problem urinating, vaginal haemorrhage, female sexual dysfunction, malaise, chills, fever, weakness, thirst, weight decreased, weight increased.

anaemia (paleness)

kidney problems

pancreatitis

inflammation of the liver (may be seen as yellow skin or eyes)

breast swelling in males, impotence

intestine problem, ear infection, cancer, swollen glands, high cholesterol, low blood sugar, physical symptoms due to stress or emotions, drug dependence, psychotic disorder, aggression, paranoia, suicidal thoughts and behaviour, sleep walking, premature ejaculation, coma, abnormal movements, difficulty moving, increased sensation, sensory disturbance, glaucoma, tear problem, spots in front of eyes, double vision, light hurts eye, blood in the eye, enlarged pupils, heart attack, slow heart beat, heart problem, poor circulation of arms and legs, closing up of throat, breathing fast, breathing slow, difficulty talking, hiccups, blood in stool, sore mouth, tongue ulceration, tooth disorder, tongue problem, mouth ulceration, problems with liver function, skin problem with blisters, hair rash, hair texture abnormal, skin odour abnormal, bone disorder, decreased urination, urinary incontinence, urinary hesitation, excessive vaginal bleeding, dry vaginal area, red painful penis and foreskin, genital discharge, prolonged erection, breast discharge, hernia, injection site scarring, drug tolerance decreased, difficulty walking, abnormal laboratory tests, semen abnormal, injury, relaxation of blood vessels procedure.

candidiasis (fungal infection, may affect skin or the mucosa) 

angioedema, such as swollen face, tongue or pharynx, difficulty to swallow, hives and difficulties to breath.

severe hypersensitivity reactions including shock. Symptoms of a hypersensitivity reaction may include fever, rash, swelling and sometimes a fall in blood pressure

inflammation of your mouth (stomatitis)

colitis (bowel inflammation)

changes in test values such as sodium, cholesterol and triglyceride levels

very severe skin reactions with reddening, blistering, severe inflammation and skin loss.

an autoimmune disease of the skin known as Cutaneous lupus erythematosus

Decrease in white blood cells, decrease in clotting cells, low thyroid hormones, endocrine problem, diabetes, high blood sugar, low blood salt, terrifying abnormal dreams, headache, muscular movement problems (such as moving a lot, tense muscles and difficulty walking), passing out, confusion, light-headedness, vision abnormal, unequal pupils, bleeding problems (such as nose bleed, stomach bleeding, or blood in urine), pancreatitis, serious liver function problems, yellow jaundice, skin oedema, skin reaction to sun, itching, joint pain, muscle cramps, breast enlargement, menstrual irregularities, swelling in legs, problems with clotting, and severe allergic reaction.

An increased risk of bone fractures has been observed in patients taking this type of medicine.

Terryfing dreams and nightmares

Hate.

*Instead of a bottle of water.

**Something I would highly recomend more people to do frequently.

***Cat acts as a parrot and wants to be a lion. She told me so.

****Ah, those were the days. Don't ask.

*****And me being me, and possibly looking like a junkie on the best of days.

******Looking at you, McD.

*******But I can't, cause I'm afraid they would snap like dry twigs.

Interlude (with teasers)

Cat: Why are you cleaning the flat?
Me: We might get visitors in the near future.
Cat: Oh crap, I'll go get rid the secret stash of a-
Me: Not that kind of visitors. Real people.
Cat: Ok, but why are you all weird and stuff? And shouldn't you write something about something?
Me: Uhm, I think maybe the painkillers are building up in my system or something. I do indeed feel weird, and probably shouldn't post anything hate-related right now.
Cat: But you have many hate-related documents going, I've seen them. More about music, the body and some rather big ones on religion, politics and everything, right? Even redoing the 10 comm-
Me: No, no spoilers Potatobeak.
Cat: Could you at least figure out how to link and divide words correctly in English?
Me: Shut up. Go eat something.
Cat: I wish I was a lion.
Me: Right, sure, whatever.
Cat: Then I'd eat you.
Me: ...

I will not to turn this into another blog about cats. It's all about the hate. Promise.


"I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me." - M.M.

Hail to the King, baby! (blog that other guy)

Meanwhile, in Mandal, Norway

Scene: Overly cluttered living room. Hateful man in front of computer. Cat not caring all over the place.

 

People of interest.

 

Man: Me. Possibly.

Cat: Potatobeak. Probably.

Man: What should we hate today, cat?

Cat: Mice.

Man: Yes?

Cat: And men.

Man: A hate of Mice and men? Really, that again?

Cat: Sorry.

Man: You should be. Go clean everything.

Cat: ....

Man: Did you hear me? Do something useful while I bask in glorious hate.

Cat: You know I have paws, right?

Man: Fair point, you may lick the dishes.

Cat: Also, I can't really talk.

Man: Right. Will this be like the time you wanted me to get Therapy? This is all in my head, sort of thing? Trying to get out of our responsibilities again, are we?

Cat: Why do I even bother.

Man: Why indeed. Today we will really like Stephen King and HATE Dean Koontz. Now, make me dinner.*

Hate

And that is why we really, REALLY like Stephen King and hate Dean Koontz today.

Because I can.

Stephen King is The King of modern literature. Read everything and maybe see some of the movies and series (some of the movies are terrible, but you can't blame The King for that). The end.

Now, Dean Koontz, on the other hand, how can I describe him? As an author I mean, I'm not 100% certain he is a bad person, he may only be slightly blogged up.

Let us call him the poor, uneducated, right-wing, conservative-christian, America-blessing, animal-loving-so-much-that-it-is-creepy man's Stephen King. I don't hate all his books, just most of them, and the author himself. Why have I read them, then? I was mislead, folly of youth, the cat made me do it, pick one.

The point is, the world is not brimming with great horror authors, so I try to check out the ones I come by. Also, I need to kill a lot of time at work, and so listen to a lot of audio-books.**

So as I was making my way through Koontz' catalogue, a disturbing pattern appeared. This part may contain spoilers, but don't worry, you won't read his books after this, anyway Ok, pattern.

Koontz is to horror, what C.S. Lewis is to fantasy.

Talking animals will appear, dogs in particular. Over and over. It's like going to blogging Narnia.

There will be a happy ending 99% of the time. Sort of like Narnia -“yey, Aslan lives!”***

The good guys always think they are damaged somehow, but it turns out they only needed some love and care. Love overcomes E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G. -sigh-

If love doesn't overcome evil, then faith will. This may be, because the bad guys tend to be... hmmm... let's see now.... Satan. Or someone or something that thinks it is satan. Evil satanist cultists. Misguided scientists who try to undo the great lord's work with heathen science. Evil muslim terrorists. Evil satanist terrorists. Fallen priests. Russians. Or just plain evil psychos that are thrown in to be evil and have spectacular bad morals/core values. The supernatural and science is equally bad, and gets dealt with as such. Talking dog is happy, good guy finds love and much happiness. Such faith. Wow.

So what is the worst book? Hell, I don't know. The problem is that there is just so many of them, some of them are rubbish, some of them merely bad, and a couple of them are really good. I will not tell which. Either dig your own gold and suffer the rubbish or forgo the gold and the rubbish.

In the book Breathless, he just about says that Darwin was wrong and hooray for creationism. That one is just terrible. The single book that really made me hate the characters and the plot however, is Watchers.

I will now spoil the book. hate

Two creatures are created in a lab. One is a super-intelligent golden retriever. The other is a monkey-lizard-dog-monster. Dog gets lots of love, nice Doggy. Monster gets hate, ugly Monster. He is a monster and supposed to kill things. Monster is quite smart too, and kind of mad he didn't get to be a nice doggy. He got big teeth, a bucket of everything ugly and killer instinct. He hates Dog and mirrors in particular and everything else in general. The one thing they have in common, is their love for Disney cartoons, Mickey Mouse is their guilty pleasure of choice. Of course they both escape the lab. Stuff happens, the plot goes on. The only thing the Monster wants, is to kill that damned pretty Dog, kill people and smash mirrors, and perhaps come to terms with his life and ugliness, such as it is. Quite understandable in my book. Maybe a bit of misguided hate there, Dog did not create him, but hey, I get it. Now, Dog finds Hero-guy. Hero-guy finds pretty Abused-lady. They all move into a nice house and play weird family, blah blah blah. After overcoming impossible odds, Monster tracks down Dog to kill him, it will be his catharsis. Hero-guy shoots Monster over and over. Monster lies sobbing in the rain, dying. He keeps on saying (because Monster has taught himself to speak) “Hurt”, “kill Dog” and “kill me” over and over. In his claws, he clutches the god damn mickey mouse video tape that Family gave Dog for christmas. Monster stole it before he died, so he too could have something nice. WTF ?! I mean, come on! I want to re-write the entire book, have “The Outsider”, as they charmingly name Monster, kill Dog and become the King of Disneyland, where he would live happily ever after with Mickey sans mirrors. Stephen King would too, I'm sure of it.

Recently I noticed that the movie “Odd Thomas” got some attention in Empire. As admiral Akbar once said- It's a trap! I will now spoil this movie without having seen it. Odd Thomas is a series of books by Koontz. It is bad in schneaky way. The main character “Odd Thomas”,**** is the protagonist who will forever be faithful to his dead girlfriend (and thus remain pure), battle just about all of the arch-type villains I mentioned, more or less without weapons (and thus remain pure) and possibly make way for the second coming of christ. I shit you not. I also ruined the movie, you just don't know it yet.

I don't even want to talk about Koontz' Frankenstein books. Just say no, ok?

Now, just go and read all the books of the King instead.

“I watched Titanic when I got back home from the hospital, and cried. I knew that my IQ had been damaged.” - Stephen King

“I love Titanic!” - Dean Koontz******

*This could explain why there is such a mess at my place. Potatobeak doesn't really pull her own weight. We need to have a talk.

**The only audio-book I ever left halfway through is Twilight. Could not do it. It was killing my brain, slowly. Haaaaaaaate

***I say blog Aslan and the stupid boat he came in on.

****I might make some sort of legal complaint. This should clearly be my name.

*****Possibly made up quote.

Life, the universe and everything.

Life, the universe and everything:

Which of course means “People: what the hell is wrong with them and what does that have to do with music?”

Hate!

I am just a little tiniest bit of* a music fascist. I don't like going to clubs or bars, or indeed parties, where the music is what I would call bad.** In fact I hate it. This often leads to antisocial behavior and much grumpiness, as I with an absolute minimum of violence try to take control of whatever device that produce said music.

On the other hand, if I enjoy the music, I will be happy, get somewhat drunk and kicked out of any and all establishments without fail, but that is another story. With lots and lots of hate in it. Back to the topic.

What people fail to understand, is that they have shit taste in music. This is not necessarily their fault (though, some people you just can't help, no matter how much you shout at them).

You see, it is life, Universal (sorry) hate and everything that is to blame, and by that I mean the “music industry”.

Most people like popular music, somehow known as “pop”, or popular music, since it is the most popular music. Commence loop. See what I did there? Anyways, if logic had something to do with anything, this should mean that the most popular music, is the best music, made by the most talented people, with the greatest sense of music artistry, poetry and skillful handling of instruments.

It must be, RIGHT?

Music is the universal language, the human race probably made music before we learned to talk. Music is deeply personal and moving to both performers and listeners.

Music is recognized as art and has been so for a long time.

Music is also a billion dollar industry.

Hate

A standard hit is produced by a recipe. To make a hit, there are many criteria that must be met. None of them are artistic. You do however need about 1,5 million dollars.

You need a catchy title. The title must be repeated. There much be a hook. The hook must be repeated. People should be able to hum or whistle the chorus. It must be the optimum length for radio play/attention span. And so on. And then some.

Well, if an artist can accomplish all these things, then a hit is well deserved, you may say.

Thing is, that the artist doesn't make the melody, or possibly even lyrics or titel of their songs.

The producers do. There are heaps of producers and songwriters who specialize in making hits for the big “artists”.

Ok, ok, you say, maybe that is so, but who cares, if someone else wrote the melody and mixed the instruments, she (yes, probably she, and that includes Bieber) sings so lovely and lyrics are so meaningful.

This is the point where I get passive aggressive and start pounding my head in any hard surface readily available. hate

Have you even listened to the lyrics of hit music lately? In some cases they are utterly meaningless nonsense, in most cases they are mind-numbingly stupid and/or boring.

And as the singing goes, how the hell do you know she can sing? And don't you blogging dare to say you saw it in the music video. I will bash my own head in on said hard surface. There will be blood. Daniel Day Lewis will possibly kill you in a bowling alley if there is any justice.

Autotune and lipsync is what you get these days. RHCP didn't even play their instruments at the super bowl, for blogs sake.

Oh, and if you say you want to see the music video, because she (yes, she) is just so damn hot and barely wears any clothes, then GO WATCH SOME PORN! Don't confuse your porn with your music***. Unless it is porngroove funk, but that is another matter entirely.

Ok, back on track.

So I hear you ask...

If the artist has no or little artistic talent, can possibly sing ok (or not), and someone I probably never heard of wrote the music, why is she so popular, we can't all like this song and “be wrong”.

Sure you can. Studies (that I can't be bothered to link to) show that if one song is “liked”, it will get more likes. If it reaches critical mass likes, it will get more likes, just because it has been liked by a certain amount of others, so when a song is liked by a lot of people, it must be good, therefore you will like it. A song that is disliked will automatically get more dislikes, because everyone dislikes it, so it must be bad. I know what I mean, even if you don't.

Throw the Big 3 into the equation. Sony, Universal and Warner. They are the 3 major labels, and they WILL TELL YOU what is good music. They will even make it popular. You will hear their exciting new talents of the new musical trend that is so cool, and they will even bring you that old artist that wasn't so exciting last year, but has had a total make-over and is ready for that come back you have been waiting and hoping for, for so long now and isn't it just great?

They will tell the radio and TV stations that this is the new hit single, it will become very popular, and they will spend truckloads of money on the promotion, so it can not fail.

So the song goes on the A list rotation of the radio stations and music channels, the “artist”, will go on all the right talk shows, and will possibly 1: make some sort of exciting controversy in main media, or 2: be the front person for some new product line. hate

At this point I will say that I don't have a problem with Miley Cyrus. If I had worked for Disney in that way for many years, I would probably smoke a joint and rub my ass against people too.

If she doesn't die from suicide or OD by the age of 27, I predict interesting things. Take the time to check out the 27 club if you don't know what that is.

Do I have a point to this rant? Maybe.

I would really, REALLY like to say that there are so and so many musicians in the world. I can't. Google will not tell me. But I will guess. I will set the ratio 1 musician to every 1000 other whatevers. 7 000 000 000 people on the earth and then some. 7000 000 ? That is a nice number. Not a hard fact in any way, but a nice round number. So how many of these musicians have you heard? 100? 5000? 439561? It's not important. What is important, is that you have probably not heard a fraction of the available music. If I sat down today, quit my job, and decided to only read books and listen to music for the rest of my life, I would not be able to hear all the music of the world before I died, and I will not even talk about the books. So maybe the point is this.

The best song, the greatest artist, the most utterly mind-boggling melody, you have not heard is out there, (so is also the worst, but that's life)****, so why the burning, blogging hell, do you insist on listening to the crap the big industry feeds you? Stop it. Right now. And hate the bad music long and hard.

This is also why my tv is not hooked up to any signal, but that is also for another day.

“...We live in a world where John Lennon was murdered, yet Barry Manilow continues to put out fucking albums. God-dammit! If you are gonna kill somebody, have some fucking taste.” -

-Bill Hicks

*I am NOT a musician, nor do I have an encyclopedic knowledge of music, but I know what I like, and I will tell you so, loudly and repeatedly, until you realize you like it too.

**Utter, utter, utter CRAP ad infinitum. I would rather have sex with a rabid 400 pound gorilla, than listen to any more plastic music than I absolutely have to. Yes, we can put it to the test if you bring the gorilla.

***I will in fact take my reasoning one step further. If I ask you what kind of music you like, and you answer “any music I can dance to”, you would probably be better off making porn. And possibly listen to good music as a side effect. Just a thought.

****The best/worst whatver you have not met/seen/heard applies to EVERYTHING. Remember this. It may become important one day.

“It's cool to hate!” - The Offspring

Establishing the premise.

I Hate to Hate the Things I Hate. Hate!

Welcome. My agenda today will consist of 4 points of interest.

1. The name of the blog.
2. Why the blog.
3. What the blog.
4. Blog you.

You are now entertained.

1. Name of the blog.
   
   

I don't really like blogs. I could easily say I hate blogs and bloggers. ( yes,yes, hypocrisy blah blah, see part 2 of todays agenda). So why do I use the word hate? It is such a strong word -And I will make use of the word hate frequently, I may try to make some kind of record. Possibly. Hate

Well, people use the word love all day long, in all sorts of stupid contexts, and thus leaving the word with no weight or meaning. Love has become immaterial. I will attempt to balance all this meaningless, surplus love in the universe, with some low-grade, quality hate. I'll use the word hate in much the same way as people use love. Not that I see myself as a particularly hateful person, quite the opposite, but I have a huge capacity for grumpiness, sourness and dark moods. Let us put all that in a bucket and call that low-grade hate, let it mature for 30+ years and behold the creature society built.

Also. I have been called many things, some good, some bad, and some rather neutral and not so interesting things. Hate One of those things were "that guy who hates everyone and everything". So there you go.

Lastly, there is the matter of my ex-wife's blog. It is quite excellent and called "I love to love the words I love". Enter the great balancer of the cosmos – me. I recommend her blog, it is well written, intelligent, funny and bursting with optimism. And possibly love. hate Mine will probably not be. Just to make it clear, this is not slander of that blog, nor do I wish to demean it in any way. Ok? Ok.

There is also the small matter of Ole M B, and his promise to collect his dreams in some sort of book of the horrific, magnificent and weird, if I do this blog.

2. Why the blog.

I hate things. Lots and lots of things. At this moment in time that is here and now, something tells me I should make some sort of disclaimer, don't want to worry people. Again.

I am not talking about he soul burning hate that launches armadas and starts wars or makes you wear your cat as a hat (I only wear my cat as parrot, on the shoulder) and try to bite people. It is more of a low-key, slow-burn, mood-souring thing. If you have issues with the title, pretend it is called I don't like things, or possibly, Ponies are the Best. Hate

Anyways. I am aware that there is a triple negative (sort of, well not really, but you see what I mean) in I hate to hate the things I hate. This makes sense. I don't want to hate stuff. Sadly, the world is somewhat imperfect and refuses to bend to my wishes. So I hate stuff. And I hate that I have to hate stuff. And so on. And I hate blogs. So in order to rectify one of my many problems, i.e. I don't like blogs and bloggers, I have to make one myself. This ensures me not hating it. My broken English aside, I'm quite happy with this arrangement.

3. What the blog.

This should be fairly obvious. Things I hate. There are lots of them.

Some things should be said. If I hate a thing, it should be taken as a given that it is a bad and blogged up thing. I am right, unless I am wrong. This is not open for discussion, nor is my hate. I refuse to research facts beyond a quick search on Google, or I will possibly just pull them from memory as I remember them.

I hate having bad memory.

Another fact worth noting, is that I have impeccable taste. This goes under the "I am always right rule". Unless I am wrong. I hardly ever am, and it is not up for discussion. Hate

I don't do design and I don't understand pcs. This will be obvious and possibly entertaining.

4. Blog you.

Sorry.

I hate it here. - Spider Jerusalem